Encouraging Words from Cary Schmidt » communication

Thoughts On Blogging…

caryschmidt — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 15:35:42 +0000

I’ll never forget the first time I heard the word “blog.” It sounded like my friend burped. And the concept sounded about as stupid. That was years ago, and—well, it is self-evident that the concept caught on, not only for me but for millions of others. We live in a day when everybody and their brother has a blog. And like every other form of media or communication—blogging has its positives and negatives in contributing to daily life on earth.

Some people blog for business reasons. Some blog for family. Some blog for gossip and criticism. Some blog for platform or personal “branding.” For better or worse, blogging is here. And here’s why and how I jumped in:

Reasons I Blog:

1. To Glorify the Lord Jesus—I desire for every single opportunity for ministry and every single word of ministry to honor the Lord Jesus. To me, social networking and blogging are purely and simply ministry opportunities.

2. To Encourage Others—I remember sitting down to think of a name for this blog and immediately thought of “Encouraging Words.” I wanted something “cooler” but came up with nothing but blanks! I am encouraged by reading the blogs of friends, so perhaps I can return the favor. It’s that simple.

3. To Pass Along Helpful Information—A lot of my friends in ministry exchange ideas and questions back and forth. It occurred to me that a blog would be a reasonable place to post such questions/thoughts that might help others in similar situations.

4. To Inform Ministry Friends of Resources—I desired a way to inform friends when our ministry is introducing a new book, curriculum, or resource.

5. To Have a Place to Share Ministry Experiences—My ministry learning curve is still HUGE, I realize that. But I still enjoy posting some learning experiences here that might help someone in ministry who is younger than me.

6. To Protect My Name Online—This is perhaps the last of all reasons, but occasionally I am slandered online. Why should I give Google results to someone who is lying about me?

7. To Grow in Writing—Sitting down to write here, on my personal time, helps me grow, think, and stretch myself. Some people golf. Others boat. Some play the stock market. Everybody has some sort of hobby or interest that helps them disconnect and restore. One of mine is writing.

8. To Communicate with Friends/Family—This was especially helpful when I was battling cancer. Being able to update people easily was a blessing.

9. To Promote Biblical Living—I figure it this way. There are lots of negative, back-biting, mean-spirited Christians online. Why should we let them dominate? For a few minutes a week, I’d like to be an encouraging online voice for those who would like to read.

10. To Promote Biblical Ministry—God still blesses the principles of His Word in ministry, and I enjoy sharing how he’s doing that at our church.

11. To Leave a Life Message Behind–This might sound simplistic, but I don’t expect to live forever. In fact, after this year, I’m just glad to still be here right now. Perhaps the things posted here can outlast me in some way for a good purpose.

NOT Reasons I Blog:

1. I don’t blog to gain a following or readership—I really have no clear strategy for building readership. That’s in God’s hands, and if you show up here on some regular basis, I am grateful!

2. I don’t blog to earn money—lots of bloggers do so for side income. That’s fine. I don’t.

3. I don’t blog to appear to be someone or something I am not—Sometimes this is a matter of the reader’s perception. But just for clarity, I am nothing and Jesus is everything.

4. I don’t blog to pass myself off as an expert—Again, this is a perception thing. There is no area of my life in which I have “arrived” or in which it’s all under control. It’s only by God’s grace that I am ever allowed a voice of any kind. Personal experiences are shared here, not in arrogance or pride, but in a spirit of transparency. I’m just a growing Christian struggling as much as the next guy trying to serve the Lord—nothing more.

5. I don’t blog to strategize my online presence or brand—I hear these terms every now and then, and for some, I guess that’s fine. But I couldn’t care less about my personal “brand”—whatever that is.

6. I don’t blog to promote self or build my own platform—this is another term I hear or see sometimes. Platform might be a great goal for someone in secular work—someone trying to build a public speaking career. For ministry, I think the best platform is “He must increase and I must decrease.”

7. I don’t blog to impress anyone—Again—a perception thing. You could read a post and think, “Who does this guy think he is?” Or you could read it and think, “Well, I’m really glad he shared those thoughts.” It’s sort of up to you, but again for clarity—I am nothing and Jesus is everything. Be impressed with HIM.

How I Blog:

1. On personal time—This is not something I do during “work hours”—my daily efforts to serve the Lord in ministry at my church. It’s a personal hobby that refreshes me and brings some purpose to (and something productive from) my “disconnected” times.

2. As an overflow of my own spiritual growth—A long time ago, God just put on my heart to share stuff He teaches me. I guess that’s a call to preach or teach. I’m not sure. I just know God compels me to transfer His truth to others in a way that makes the light-bulb go on in my own head. Teaching or preaching is a part of that. Writing is too.

3. About subjects that I face in the trenches of ministry—Someone asked me years ago, “Do you ever see yourself writing full time?” I laughed and said, “What would I write about?” It goes this way—I want to wake up, love my family, serve God, and encourage people every day. From those experience in the trenches of life and ministry, if I learn something or come across something helpful, I want to pass it on to others.

4. In a spirit of friendship, encouragement, and humility—Learning from others goes both directions. I learn from people older and younger than me. I learn from people with more experience and from those with less. Everything shared in this blog is simply offered from a heart that desires to be helpful.

5. In collaboration with daily ministry, not competition with it—I think this one speaks for itself.

6. Typically only publishing a post after I’ve re-edited it multiple times over several days or weeks.

7 . With limited time investment—frankly, I just don’t have a lot of time to do this. My target is a few minutes a week and about one post per week. Sometimes I hit that, sometimes less or more (thanks to reposts!) This is really just an overflow of baseline ministry.

So there you have it—why and how I blog—for what it’s worth.

One day at the judgement seat of Christ, lots of Christians are going to be ashamed of how they gossiped and hurt others through online communication—blogs, tweets, posts, status updates, etc. Lots of people will be embarrassed by the silliness, carnality, and human emotions that they hastily and carelessly threw online. Others will be surprised to discover how carnal and unChristlike their spirit was.

Influence is a stewardship that we should take seriously for Christ. Online and off—determine to steward your influence wisely for the glory and honor of Jesus Christ and for the edification, equipping, and encouragement of anyone gracious enough to stop and read.

Spiritual Weapons for Wayward Kids

caryschmidt — Mon, 10 Oct 2011 06:58:03 +0000

What can you do when your grown children begin to stray spiritually? I’ve seen a lot of parents hurt, mystified, and shaken by sudden and radical spiritual changes in the lives of their adult children. I realize, one day I may be one of them—and so could you.

In these moments, some parents grasp for control—trying to maintain a mythical strangle-hold of childhood authority. This always escalates a situation to become worse and creates greater distance relationally and spiritually. In a wild swing to the other extreme—some parents abandon their post of parental influence. They mentally, emotionally, and spiritually disconnect with an “oh well” resignation, as if there is nothing they can really do. Others respond in anger—returning hurt for hurt.

Recently, Dana and I prayerfully and fearfully sat down with some parents who were facing circumstances in which we all felt powerless. Together, we rediscovered the weapons God had given us to fight battles that are far beyond our human control. And together, we saw God work a miracle. These are the weapons that God gives us all to use against impossible circumstances:

Unconditional Love and Acceptance—regardless what my child does, how my child hurts me, or how far out of bounds my child behaves—I will choose to respond with Christ-like compassion and unconditional love. This is a powerful weapon that speaks to the heart and the conscience. By the way, acceptance of a person does not equal approval of sin.

Godly Grace—regardless of what my child has done, I extend grace—unmerited favor. Just as grace is God’s response to my sin, grace will be my response to my child’s sin. Grace is always undeserved, and is the most powerful resource for creating an environment where repentence and change are possible.

Intercessory Prayer—this weapon brings all the powers of Heaven to work in the situation. It is the single most powerful and yet most neglected response to any strained relationship.

God’s Word—opinions and personal preferences matter little, but the principles of God’s Word are powerful. When battles of the will only escalate a situation, the principles of God’s Word speak to the heart with the potential of lasting life change.

Patient Endurance—change takes time. Repentence is rarely instantaneous. Parents who win these battles never give up (emphasis on NEVER.) They faithfully and persistently use these weapons until the battle is won.

These are weapons of the Spirit. Think about it:

Weapons of flesh will react, weapons of the Spirit will respond.
Weapons of flesh will lash out. Weapons of the Spirit will reach out.
Weapons of flesh desire retribution. Weapons of the Spirit desire reconciliation.
Weapons of flesh will seek control. Weapons of the Spirit will seek influence.
Weapons of flesh will make demands. Weapons of the Spirit will make pleas.
Weapons of flesh will acuse. Weapons of the Spirit will accept.
Weapons of flesh will return hurt. Weapons of the Spirit will return grace.
Weapons of flesh will argue. Weapons of the Spirit will reason.

Here they are again: unconditional love, godly grace, intercessory prayer, God’s Word, and patient endurance.

Take hope, parent! If you are facing impossible circumstances and you feel hopeless and powerless—there is much you can do to fight a spiritual battle for your wayward child! God’s work is not finished in your child’s heart, and God’s Word is still powerful to change lives!

In reality, these weapons are effective in any broken or strained relationship. About the time you think there’s nothing you can do, about the time you want to over-react or fight in the flesh—these are the only weapons that can truly make a difference. May God give us wisdom to fight our relational battles in the wisdom of His Word and the power, and filling of His Holy Spirit.

iPad, iPhone, Apps, and Ideas…

caryschmidt — Sun, 17 Oct 2010 00:22:42 +0000

(This one’s just for fun…)

When iPad was introduced, nearly every blog and media outlet had an article about it. Some were sceptical, some critical, some more analytical, and some prophetic. Six months into using an iPad, and a couple years for the iPhone, I wanted to share how these devices have impacted my ministry and life. Just as I benefit from the ideas of others in these areas, perhaps these ideas will prove helpful to you. Here’s why the iPad and iPhone have been worth the investment:

1. Reading, Reading, and More Reading—if you buy books, an iPad (or a Kindle) would eventually pay for itself. Before iPad, I had no intention of turning to digital books. Since the iPad, my first thought is, “Can I purchase this book for Kindle software?” Most of the time the answer is “yes” and books cost a lot less digitally.

Reading on the iPad is a great experience, therefore I find myself doing a lot more of it. There’s a lot of great reading material for the Kindle, and a lot of it is free. One final thought—Amazon has made Kindle software for multiple devices which means your library is truly portable.

2. No More Leather Planner—for years my primary organizational tool was a leather binder—it had a tab for every area of ministry, major events, teaching outlines, prayer lists, and a calendar. Thanks to Evernote, everything in that binder has been moved into a digital format where it can be accessed from iPad, iPhone, and computer.

3. More Ubiquitous Information—the volume of information instantly accessible from these devices actually presents a new way of thinking. It involves some retraining for your brain. Actually working the possibilities into the flow of daily life requires practice, discovery, and idea-sharing with others.

For instance, two weeks ago I was at Matt Chappell’s wedding and the family needed a “Just Married” sign for his car. Rather than grope through a yellow pages or ask the front desk, iPhone provided a quick solution. I opened the map application, typed in “party supply” and a red pin popped up within walking distance of my location. Two seconds later I was on the phone with the clerk, and five minutes later I was checking out with a “Just Married” sign.

Here’s another use case—during family vacation we visited Gettysburg, York, and Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. We repeatedly turned to the iPad or iPhone, looking up historical sites and cities in wikipedia. We also saved several hours by being able to view traffic. This type of instant access to information is truly a game-changer in the flow of life.

4. A Better Work Environment than a Phone—for years I’ve wished I could make iPhone bigger when trying to answer emails and text messages, or when trying to read something. I’ve longed for a bigger solution for portable work and reading, and the solution has exceeded my expectations.

5. A More Portable and Simple Work Environment than a Computer—it’s hard to describe or define exactly where the space is between your phone and your computer—but when you begin using the iPad, you find it. I think it’s different with every person, but it’s there. For me it’s turned out to be about ease of use and speed. The phone is about extreme portability. The iPad is about reading, interacting with information, and light work. The computer is about the heavy lifting and extended work.

6. A Huge Battery Life—this is one of the best features of the iPad—you just can’t kill the battery. (With iPhone I’m constantly aware of battery drain.) The only downside is that iPad makes every other device in your life seem to have ridiculously short battery life!

7. Connectivity Everywhere—with the development of cloud computing and services like MobileMe, Dropbox, Evernote, Gmail, Outlook, Google Docs, and a host of others; more and more of our digital lives are stored online and we expect to be able to access them from any device, anywhere, anytime. iPad just takes great advantage of these types of services and brings them to you in a very interactive and fluid way.

8. Presentations in Teaching and Preaching—I didn’t expect this one to be on the list, but doing a keynote presentation from iPad is really awesome. The ease and simplicity makes it irresistible.

9. A Bit of Entertainment as Well—It would be wrong not to admit that using these devices is just plain fun. Whether it’s reading Winnie the Pooh to Haylee, playing “Memory Cards” with our family, or teaching Dana how to play solitaire, we’ve had a good time.

Not long ago, I was being “poked at” by a good friend for liking Apple products and having to “have the newest thing.” He said, “Look at your face, you just find a lot of pleasure in this stuff.” He was actually amused with me. In all seriousness, I said, “It’s really not about mere pleasure. I’m just very pleased with how profoundly these technologies have impacted my life on every level of personal productivity and information management.” That’s the simple truth.

To wrap up this post, here are the apps that I use the most. They are pretty much the same on iPad and iPhone (with a few exceptions):

Built In—Calendar, Email, Contacts, Safari, iPod,

Downloaded Apps—Amazon Kindle, Evernote, iDisk or DropBox, Things, Keynote, Olive Tree Bible Reader, Logos Bible Library, Early Edition or Feedler (RSS Readers), Quick Office, Twitter, USA Today, Fluent News, Wikipanion, Dragon Dictation

iPhone Only—VLingo, Banking, Flight Tracker, Dictionary, Amazon, Ebay, Yelp, Byline, HandiBible, Around Me

Now it’s your turn… comment below and share an idea, an app, or a perspective that might benefit others who are trying to implement good ideas for God’s glory.

Preaching that Pleases God

caryschmidt — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 14:00:34 +0000

A New Book by Tom Farrell from Striving Together Publications.

If you are interested in growing teacher or preacher of the Word of God, you must read Preaching that Pleases God by Tom Farrell. It’s one of the best books I’ve ever read on the subject, and it will challenge you to be a more faithful preacher and teacher of God’s truth.

We were privileged to enter into this project about a year ago with Dr. Farrell. Personally, I was profoundly impacted by Tom Farrell’s preaching as a teenager, and it was a great blessing to be able to help in this project. Dr. Farrell has faithfully and powerfully preached God’s Word and trained preachers throughout his ministry. He is a man with the obvious anointing of God on his life, and this book flows from a passionate heart, a skilled mind, and a fruitful life.

You can find out more or order your copy at Striving Together Publications! Thank you Dr. Farrell for a much needed challenge to return to Holy Spirit empowered Bible preaching!

Communication on a Winning Team

caryschmidt — Sat, 12 Jun 2010 16:28:28 +0000

Communication is about sharing information with those who need it. But often communication is what is lacking the most on ministry teams. When we don’t communicate, we aren’t working together, and that causes things to break down. Here are seven quick principles that the Lord has challenged me to work at. I pray they will encourage you to be a better communicator on your team:

Don’t Make Your Leader Pull Information—Push it His Direction—Leaders must make informed decisions, and leaders always need more information—they thrive on it. Followers don’t always understand a leader’s need for information. Good communication always gathers information and pushes it to the people who need it. For more on this, see this article: “Why Leaders Needs More Communication.”

Be More Focused on Talking to Someone than about Someone—On struggling teams, people sit around and bite on each other. They are frustrated with others, and they need to air their grievances with sympathetic listeners. But this is destructive! On winning teams, people talk to each other and resolve their grievances. It’s simple, but HUGE!

Be More Focused on Providing Solutions than Pointing Out Problems—Some people are professional “problem-pointer-outers.” They see all the problems, but they never offer a solution, they never take action to be a part of the process of improvement. It’s not that winning teams are blind to the problems, they just view them differently. Rather than see only problems and gripe about them, they see the problems and immediately start working on solutions. This is an easy rut to fall into. Try to make it your goal to never bring up a problem unless you can offer several helpful solutions.

Be More Focused on Taking Responsibility than Fixing Blame—What is our human fixation with having to assign blame? Have you noticed how much attention on the recent oil spill has been spent on fixing blame, and blame-shifting? Winning teams don’t really care who’s to blame because whoever it is, they’ve already owned it! Winning team members take responsibility—they step up, raise their hands, and say, “This one is all my fault… I’m sorry!” This instantly allows the whole team to focus on a solution and recovery. Assigning blame is a diversion. As long as we are trying to find out who’s fault this is, we’re probably not getting a solution into place. Taking responsibility is a rare character quality in today’s culture.

Be More Focused On Giving Credit than Getting Credit—Winning teams don’t really care who gets the credit. Credit is pretty lame any way. We all know that ultimately God gets the credit for any good thing. And if He allowed you to be part of a good outcome, there were probably others who helped make it happen. Winning teams share credit and constantly thank others for their contribution to the good.

Be More Focused on Glorifying God than Getting Your Way—Losing teams are very territorial and fractured by personal agenda. When we are territorial we get tunnel visioned—about budgets, about schedules, about facilities—we want to fight for our piece of the pie. This isn’t how winning teams function. Winning teams see the larger perspective and work together for the good of the whole. This means territories and personal agendas have to give way to the larger perspective of giving God glory.

Be More Focused on Helping Others Succeed, and Rejoice When They Do—On losing teams, members step on each other to elevate themselves. Winning teams are focused on helping each other succeed. Winning teams have lots of really great players that are willing to be located in the middle of the flow-chart somewhere. For a winning team, the leader’s success is a win for the whole team.

Are you on a winning team? Ask God today to help you become a more effective team member by communicating in a way that helps the whole team move forward!

New Podcast—Partnerships of Ministry

caryschmidt — Mon, 10 May 2010 23:37:12 +0000

The May edition of the Spiritual Leadership podcast has posted from Dr. Paul Chappell. This lesson is entitled “The Partnerships of Ministry,” and it focuses on developing and maintaining the right kind of strong relationships while serving in the ministry. Key statement from the lesson—the Devil tries to ruin all spiritual relationships! Great lesson!

The Spiritual Leadership podcast is a free resource from Striving Together Publications (a ministry of Lancaster Baptist Church and West Coast Baptist College).

You can subscribe to this podcast through iTunes and listen on your computer or iPod. You can also receive the complimentary outline with each lesson. Click here for more information about subscribing to the outline.

To hear our newest podcast, Ministry127, be sure to visit Ministry127.com!

Enjoy the lesson!

Daily in the Word Now on 450 Stations!

Cary Schmidt — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 19:55:22 +0000

Beginning October 1st (tomorrow), the daily radio ministry of Dr. Paul Chappell will begin airing on the CSN radio network. This means that Daily in the Word is now heard on over 450 radio stations across America and in some foreign countries. Daily in the Word is a 26 minute daily radio program featuring solid Bible teaching and preaching.

In addition, www.dailyintheword.org has also been completely redesigned and will go live on October 1. This site provides information on broadcast times and stations, as well as a link to recent broadcasts and the free podcast. If you don’t live in an area where Daily in the Word is broadcast, you can subscribe via iTunes.

Visit the new site tomorrow, subscribe to the podcast, and tell a friend about the great Bible preaching and teaching that can be heard on Daily in the Word!

Do Social Networks Change Behavior?

Cary Schmidt — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 00:33:26 +0000

USAToday published an interesting article today about the impact of the internet and social networking. Here are a few of the statistics they shared:

How social-networking services affect the everyday behavior of millions of Americans:

An Ohio State University study links Facebook to lower grades. According to a survey of 219 students, published in April, those who said they use Facebook had grade-point averages of 3.0 to 3.5, and studied one to five hours a week.
Non-Facebook users had GPAs of 3.5 to 4.0 and studied 11 hours or more a week.
Nearly 80% of Facebook users said they believe it had no impact on their grades.
Corporate employees may fritter away nearly 1.5% of office productivity by using Facebook at work, according to a Nucleus Research study announced in July.
The University of Melbourne, however, says people who use the Internet for personal reasons at work are 9% more productive than those who don’t.
Fourteen states have passed measures to ban texting while driving.

Read the full article here: Real-time Web keeps social networkers connected – USATODAY.com.

How to Write Readable Emails

Cary Schmidt — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 01:01:12 +0000

Have you ever received an email that, at first sight, completely sent your brain into a revolt? Funny. Regardless of the message or your affection for the sender, your brain just wants to immediately hit “delete”! Why?

Perhaps some basic things made the email appear to be a huge mental hurdle—long lines, huge paragraphs, and a buried main point. On top of this, more emails are begging to be read, so you just want to move on. Our eyes really don’t like swimming through a sea of alphabet soup!

If you would like to make life easier on your recipients, read on. Here are a few ideas for making your emails more quickly readable:

Get to the point—most emails don’t require lengthy salutations and warm introductions. (Unless you’re writing more of a personal letter, which I will address below.) The easiest emails to deal with are the ones that say “hi,” and then quickly get to the point.
Use quick thoughts and short sentences—when processing email, our brains are deluged with information—so we’re quickly looking for the pertinent information. Keep this in mind. Break it down and help your reader get through it by keeping your thoughts concise.
Use paragraphs—the return button is a wonderful thing! It gives your brain a break—like a little party between thoughts. So use it, and give your reader some space. Whatever you do—don’t send 150 lines of text with no breaks.
Keep it short, or warn your reader—the best policy is to keep email short, unless you warn your reader. And the longer the email, the longer you might wait for a reply. Let your recipient know where this is headed and why. It’s just good courtesy.
Make your request stand out clearly—your email will be more responded to if you make the request stand out somehow. Place it in first paragraph, set it apart, bold it, or emphasize it. Just be sure someone can quickly see your point.

None of these ideas are to suggest that long, personal emails are not important and valuable. I really love getting them. In fact I usually save them! But the vast majority of email communication I receive has a different point and purpose. The same is probably true with you.

Someday there will be a guidebook for email etiquette. But until then, maybe these ideas will save our readers some brain-revolt along the way.

What are some things you love and hate about email? (share your thoughts below…)

Why Leaders Need More Communication

Cary Schmidt — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 01:47:34 +0000

WARNING: Failure to communicate frequently and effectively will bring distrust, tension, and grief in any valuable relationship.

A large percentage of our problems in work, family, and ministry could be attributed to communication failures—either miscommunication or a lack of communication. Everybody has people in their lives with whom they should work at communicating more effectively and more frequently. If only the people in our lives could automatically “just know” all the things they need to hear from us! How much easier would life be—right?

If you’re somewhere in the middle of the organizational flow chart, then you have the responsibility to regularly communicate “up the chain”—to someone responsible for your workflow or your projects. A failure to communicate will bring grief into your world and will cause trust, dependability, and connectedness to suffer. This responsibility to communicate falls to you (and me).

Simply put—does your leader have to PULL information out of you? Or does your leader get information PUSHED from you?

Do you have to be tracked down and asked? Or do you voluntarily generate information to someone in leadership?

Busy leaders need reliable co-laborers to generate communication—needed information—with which they can make well-informed decisions. When we fail to generate this communication (as I have many times), we inadvertently decide to withhold information that might prove valuable in the decision-making process of the leader. This isn’t good. This isn’t team. Frankly, it’s just stupid. (Yes, I’m pointing at myself.)

The question is—how much communication does your leader desire? I’ve made the grave mistake of trying to “not bother” the leader, only to find out that more communication was needed or wanted. Good leaders usually desire a lot of information from those they lead. It’s not about trust. It’s not even about accountability. It’s about leading effectively. The more informed they are, the better they can lead.

Part of the reason you are on your leader’s team is to help keep the leader well-informed in the areas where you serve. Just remember, it’s not about being “lorded over” or merely “giving account” for your work hours. It’s about building trust, reliability, and dependability. It’s about helping the leader lead well.

So—practically speaking—find out how much communication your leader desires, and then make sure that leader gets it. Make brief, informative, and thorough communication a regular part of your daily workflow.

Unfortunately, this is one lesson I’ve learned the hard way. How often over the years I have wished I had communicated more thoroughly. How often my simple lack of communication has caused grief to myself and others!

Communication is a really good thing. Hopefully this post will challenge you to push more needed information in the right direction—and for the record, this principle also works really well in marriage too!

What are some ways you have found effective in communicating?

10 Ways to Lose a Teen’s Attention

Cary Schmidt — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 01:44:42 +0000

Quick post—the top ten ways to completely bore and disconnect with those you teach:

1. Say something not worth hearing—This is basic, but if you want people to listen, start by saying something worth hearing. The number one reason we lose the attention of those we teach is that we’re not convincing them that what we have to say is important. Since there is nothing more important than teaching young people God’s Word, we’d better make it worth hearing.

2. Say something with no passion—Have you ever heard someone teach with no voice inflection, no dynamic—nothing but monotone droning. It’s miserably hypnotic. If you’re not passionate about what you teach, don’t expect anyone else to care about it either.

3. Talk down to them—Make your listeners think that you believe they are completely stupid. Come across like you are gracing them with your brilliance and you can’t believe they don’t already know this stuff. Insult them with sharp sarcasm, personal jabs, and harshness. This will shut them down for sure.

4. Yell or scream at them—There’s a difference between preaching with passion and just raising your voice out of sheer frustration, and teens can tell the difference immediately. Preaching will stir them, but plain old yelling will just irritate them.

5. Teach outside of their context—Have you ever heard someone teach truth in a way that had no practical connection to your life whatsoever? The connection between truth and real life is not always as obvious as we would like it to be. Keeping attention requires that we constantly ask of truth: “Why do you matter to real life?!”

6. Shoot from the hip—When we don’t prayerfully prepare substantive, biblical material, we shoot from the hip—speak off the cuff—frankly, RAMBLE. If you really want to shut teens down, just start rambling and come across like you have nothing to say that was worth premeditating.

7. Use no illustrations or personal insights—Jesus was a great story-teller. He connected truth to tangible application and real life situations. Listeners need to connect with the teacher or preacher in tangible ways, and nothing can kill a great truth better than failing to give it a personal, real-life connection.

8. Talk about nothing but yourself—Have you ever heard someone tell you how great they were for 45 minutes and call it a Sunday School lesson or a sermon? Sometimes we could title our lessons, “If You Would Do What I Do, You Would Be Great Too!” Personal illustrations are helpful, but teens shut down when we cross over into bragging and self-exaltation.

9. Speak with lots of distracting idiosyncrasies—You can completely derail your listeners every time you speak if you will just develop some nervous twitches, odd phrasings, annoying postures, or awkward gestures—like frantic pacing or ill-timed arm waving. Everybody in your youth group will be able to impersonate you, but they will never remember a single thing you teach. If you want a good litmus test on this—just ask someone to impersonate you. If they have a tough time, then you’ve probably done a good job at minimizing your idiosyncrasies.

10. Have no relationship with them beyond your platform—Never personally interact or develop a relationship with those you teach. Just be a distant, platform figure with no presence or concern for real people. Remember, the health and quality of your personal relationship with your listeners is what gives you the right to be heard in the first place.

BONUS—Make it NO FUN whatsoever! Have you ever known someone that was gifted at draining every ounce of fun right out of a room as soon as they stepped in? Guaranteed—if your listeners aren’t enjoying listening, they will quickly find something else more enjoyable to think about—it’s just human nature.

It’s pretty painful to try to listen to a lesson from a speaker that didn’t work to gain and maintain your attention! It’s even more painful to be that speaker! (Yes, I know this from far too much personal experience.) Let’s work to make God’s Word come alive to those we teach!

All right, now it’s your turn! How has someone else lost your attention over the years?

Suggested Family Cell Phone Guidelines

Cary Schmidt — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 22:30:33 +0000

Seems like kids are getting cell phones younger and younger these days! This post is one I’m only doing because of requests. Several years ago, as our boys became teens, we decided to get cell phones for them—primarily so we could get a hold of them in relation to school and youth group outings. It was a good decision, but a scary one too!

Aside from triple checking that the phones couldn’t access internet, picture mail, and other features—we also had a family meeting on that first night. With my computer open, we sat together and hammered out some family guidelines for how we would use these phones. The following ten guidelines are what we came up with. They are as much a product of the kids as the parents input.

Here’s what we wrote that night as a family:

Having a cell phone in the Schmidt family is a privilege, not a right! As a privilege, it must be earned by mature responsibility.

It’s a tool, not a toy.

The primary purpose of these cell phones is for communication with Mom and Dad, so that we can stay connected as a family.

Any infraction of the following rules will result in the loss of all cell phone use immediately.
Cell phones must be cared for properly. They get charged every night, they are never to be in your pocket during play times.
Cell phones are not to be used during school or church.
Cell phones are not to be loaned to friends. Friends may use the phone only to make a quick call to parents when there is no other option.
Calls may be made or received to family and approved friends only.
All calls should be as brief as possible.
Calls to or from girls are not permitted.
All calls must have a specific purpose. No chit-chatting or idle talking is permitted.
No text messaging, except to Mom or Dad. (this one has since been revised slightly)
You will be required to pay for your own bill if you use more minutes than allowed.

The funniest result of these guidelines was the day (a couple years later) that I got my iPhone and started playing a game. Larry immediately quoted my first line, using his best “dad-impersonation” voice— “Cary, a cell phone is a tool not a toy!” We both laughed real hard at that—and that rule was quickly revised!

These lines have been occasionally crossed (usually out of forgetfulness) over the years, which made us very glad we had talked through them. They gave us a reference point for correction and appropriate discipline. They’ve pretty much remained in tact over the years—although, they will be revised as these guys grow older.

These may not be your same guidelines, but maybe they will get you thinking and talking as a family! Please share your thoughts and additional comments.

The Best and Worst Uses of Twitter

Cary Schmidt — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 19:39:10 +0000

I have written a couple of posts about twitter—why I decided to use it and things I’ve learned from the experience. Overall, twitter has been a positive experience, but not entirely. Here is a short list of the best and worst ways to use twitter:

The Best Uses of Twitter:

Encouraging Connections—Twitter is a great means of encouraging others and staying connected with helpful and strengthening relationships—friends, family, and ministry acquaintances—and what’s going on in the lives of others. I love following Pastor Chappell’s posts—they encourage me in a multitude of ways. Hundreds of times others have strengthened and encouraged my spirit through their posts.

Edifying Words—Twitter is great for sharing quotes, scriptures, and principles that edify. I love following people whose hearts are obviously focused on spiritual matters and challenging subjects. Positive thinkers and spiritually minded people have a joyful heart and challenge me to be a better Christian.

Equipping Resources—Twitter is a great way to share ideas, helpful information (eg: blog posts, stories, useful media). I have often been informed of a good article, a new book, or a resource that proved to be beneficial in some aspect of life.

The Worst Uses of Twitter:

Arguing Foolish Questions—On or off twitter this is just wrong. But it is especially undiscerning to bring an argument into the public arena of 140 character posts. What an impossible and pointless way to carry on, and a fantastic way to ruin your testimony, hurt the name of Christ, and nullify the little influence that twitter might afford. Twitter isn’t the place for airing grievances, issuing reprimands, or broadcasting contention. (Only by pride cometh contention.)

Arrogance or Narcissism—Twitter doesn’t make someone arrogant, but it does reveal it. Pride and narcissism show up easily when you’re only allowed 140 characters. Twitter is a really bad way to tell the world how great you are and how much you love yourself.

Amplifying the Wrong Voices—Twitter is a tool of communication. It publishes, influences, and amplifies—and not every voice should be amplified. Before you quote, link, or otherwise amplify a voice, think it through. Don’t inadvertently give greater exposure to voices or philosophies that are unbiblical.

Aimless and Pointless Posting—For some, twitter is nothing more than a place to post mental rubbish. Strange. In truth, Twitter is an invitation to influence. It is permission to publish. If even one person follows you, they have asked you to share your life, your heart, your thoughts. That influence is a stewardship. Before you post, ask: Does this in any way honor the Lord and encourage others?

The bottom line—twitter is influence by invitation. If you misuse it, your invitation will be revoked. If you use it wisely, others will appreciate and benefit. As Christians, our communication should be biblical, pleasing to Christ, and helpful to others.

To those who have positively influenced me through twitter—I say, “Thank you!” Keep exemplifying these best uses!

One person recently said it this way, “Twitter is simply magnifies what you already are.” May every part of our lives—including twitter—magnify Christ and that which He loves!

How have you seen twitter used positively and negatively? Share your thoughts below…

The Power of a Question

caryschmidt — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 02:49:09 +0000

Helping Others by Asking the Right Questions

Not long ago I was on our church campus on an off day. As I left the building, headed home, there was an unfamiliar man taking photos of our buildings. Trying to be hospitable and also cautious, I approached him and kindly asked where he was from. He refused to answer me and became instantly defensive and sarcastic. A few seconds later, he was angrily walking toward his car, leaving campus—simply because I asked him a question.

Have you considered the power of a question? Just as my question revealed a problem, a question can also open the heart and give way to a world of insightful dialog when you are trying to help someone.

Often times, a question will disarm the conscience and reveal ones heart to himself. I’ve heard Pastor Chappell say many times, “Accusations harden the will but questions stimulate the conscience.” If you ever find yourself in the difficult position of confronting someone or dealing with a sensitive circumstance, consider using a kindly worded question. Think of this:

Rather than—”You’re so angry!” How about—”Have I done anything to hurt you or distance you?”
Rather than—”You’re struggling spiritually!” How about—”What’s the biggest battle you’re facing right now?”
Rather than—”Your parents said you’re rebellious!” How about—”How are things with your parents?”

If you’re trying to help someone, you have to understand their heart. If you’re trying to heal a relationship you have to know where it really stands. Try asking the right questions and then listening to the answers. Here are a few questions that might enable you to help someone in a variety of situations:

“What’s the most important prayer request you have in life right now?”
“How can I be a better (fill in the blank—father, mother, pastor, etc.) for you?”
“Have I done anything to hurt you or offend you?”
“What the toughest thing about being in the 10th grade?”
“If you could change anything about your life, what would it be?”
“Is there anything I have done to create a distance between us?”
“How can I do a better job at (fill in the blank…)?”
“How are things going between you and (fill in the blank—God, parents, etc.)?”
“How is your relationship with God right now?”
“If you could change anything about me, what would it be?”
“How do you think you’re doing in this area?”
“What do you think is really holding you back right now?”
“What are you the most afraid of in this situation?”

The right question asked with the right spirit can open the heart. Often, the response (or lack of response) to a sincere question can help you understand what’s going on inside a person. Questions are powerful tools. Use them wisely with the right spirit. What are some questions you have found helpful in strengthening others or in building right relationships?

Encouraging Words Goes Mobile

Cary Schmidt — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 16:22:13 +0000

More and more people prefer to read blogs “on the go” through their mobile device. I am happy to announce that you can now view this blog in a mobile version through your mobile phone browser (designed for iPhone, Adroid, or iPod touch.) Simply type in the URL and the site should automatically detect your mobile device and adjust the site. If you prefer to view the site in it’s original form, scroll to the bottom and turn the mobile view off.

I pray the things you find here will be helpful and encouraging to your walk with the Lord.

You can also now view The Pastor’s Perspective from Pastor Chappell in this same format. Enjoy!