Encouraging Words from Cary Schmidt

Great Books for Christian Parents

By Cary Schmidt | March 8, 2010

Frequently someone asks what books I would recommend on youth ministry or parenting. They are generally the same books. While there are some good books on youth ministry, the most helpful to youth ministry are those on the family. Whether you are a parent or a youth pastor, I would urge you to read everything you can on biblical parenting and working with young heart. Over the years, these are a few books that have been profoundly helpful to me as a parent and youth pastor. I encourage you to read and pass along the information found in these books:

Posted in books and resources, family, student ministry | Tagged adolescence, biblical living, book review, books, family, parenting, student ministry, teaching, teen life | 5 Comments

Andrew Murray on Trials

By caryschmidt | March 6, 2010

This quote about trials from Andrew Murray found it’s way to me through Dr. Mark Rasmussen. Perhaps it will encourage you!

“First, He brought me here. It is by His will I am in this strait place: in that fact I will rest.”
“Next, He will keep me here in His love, and give me grace to behave as His child.”
“Then, He will make the trial a blessing, teaching me the lessons He intends me to learn, and working in me the grace He means to bestow.”
“Last, in His good time He can bring me out again – how and when He knows.”

“Let me say I am here,
1) By God’s appointment;
2) In His keeping;
3) Under His training;
4) For His time.”

Andrew Murray

Posted in christian life | Tagged biblical living, counseling, teaching | Leave a comment

10 Things Your Teen Won’t Tell You (Part 3)

By caryschmidt | March 4, 2010

This is the third and final part in this series of articles. Click here to read part one or part two.

7. I’m as confused as you are about my problems. The truth—when you, in frustration, ask—“What wrong with you!?” They honestly don’t know the answer. If you feel like you are confused about what’s going on inside their minds and hearts—join the club—so are they. This is partially due to a complete brain rebuild that’s happening between the ages of 12 and 20, but it’s also due to spiritual battle for a young heart. Be willing to work through problems together and find biblical solutions with patience and prayer.

Quote: Teens need answers to their problems and if they can’t talk to you about them and get answers they are going to go somewhere else.

8. God only needs a moment to change my life, and I need you to help me be there for that moment! We’re so quick to let less important things take the place of the teaching/preaching of God’s Word to our children. Soccer league trumps Bible Study. Birthday trip trumps church. Studying for a test trumps Sunday School. Cost savings trumps teen camp.

Posted in family | Tagged adolescence, family, parenting, student ministry, teen life | 1 Comment

10 Things Your Teen Won’t Tell You (Part 2)

By caryschmidt | March 2, 2010

This is part two of a three part series. Click here to read the first part of this article.

4. My deepest need is a sincere relationship with you. (I need time with parents.) Not only will they not say this—they won’t even admit to it or understand it. This one resides so deep in our God-given design, that we barely recognize it. It’s the life results that make it so obvious. A teenager who has a healthy relationship with Dad and Mom is just an entirely different creature than one that doesn’t. They think different, feel different (emotionally), logic different, behave different, and have vastly different lives for the long-term. The key is—you must make it happen. You must create these moments. No force on earth—not sports, not homework, not friends, not youth group, not work—should keep you from having quality, quantity time together.

Posted in family | Tagged adolescence, family, parenting, student ministry, teen life | 1 Comment

Great News about Striving Together!

By caryschmidt | February 25, 2010

Great news—Striving Together Publications is growing! Today, we launched several new specials and features:

1. A Beautiful New Home Page—this new home page has been in the works for a couple of months and we’re excited to finally launch it. You’ll find three primary rotating graphics featuring newest resources or specials. Then further down the page you can more easily navigate and browse resources right from the home page.

2. March Specials—beginning now through March 31st, you will receive $20 off any order of $100 or more.

3. 50% Discount Sale—also during this month, several titles are on sale at 50% off their regular price. Some fantastic titles are included Be sure to take a look, especially if you are needing a quantity for a church or group function.

4. New Tracts and Bulletins - we recently added 26 new bulletin covers (some of them currently being reprinted), and are also in the process of completely updating our offering of tract designs. Tracts will now be available in multiple formats and many of them preprinted for churches desiring to purchase them in smaller quantities without the customization.

5. More Books Available for Kindle—at the bottom of the page you will find a link to all titles that are currently available on the Kindle. Check back because we are adding titles to this list regularly!

There’s much more just ahead! I wish I could tell you about new publications in the works. The coming months are going to be very exciting. We also have a long list of ways we plan to improve the online store in the coming months, so stay tuned.

Take a look at the new home page and be a part of the March specials! And thank you for Striving Together with us for the gospel of Christ!

Posted in books and resources | Leave a comment

Before You Discipline Your Child…

By caryschmidt | February 23, 2010

Discipline is a sacred thing. Too often we parents take discipline too lightly or treat it too flippantly. In the big picture, all discipline is about bringing our children into a right relationship with their Heavenly Father, that He might bless their lives. It’s not about controlling behavior, modifying behavior, or minimizing embarrassment. Pure and simple, it’s about bringing them into proper alignment with the laws and favor of their gracious God.

With that in mind, there are two critical questions I must ask myself before I enter into any discipline of my children.

1. Am I Right with My Heavenly Father? It would be rather hypocritical to try to bring my child into a relationship that I will not bring myself into. It would be completely duplicitous to demand submission from my children if I myself am not submissive. I cannot expect my child to love, obey, and honor a God that I will not.

I challenge you to begin all family discipline with this question. Search your heart before you correct theirs. This will help you stay right with the Lord. It will make your discipline authentic. It will give you a spirit of humility in meting out discipline. It will give you a right perspective of your role as you are “under the authority” of your own Heavenly Father.

Posted in family | Tagged adolescence, family, parenting, student ministry, teen life | 4 Comments

Thankful for Christian Education

By caryschmidt | February 19, 2010

This past Saturday we had some family time and decided to drive over to the coast for the afternoon. It was one of the most beautiful coastal days I’ve ever seen—the sun was warm, the waves were huge, and it seemed that we had several miles of beach to ourselves. One of the highlights was being able to take a walk along the shore with Haylee.

During our walk, Haylee said, “Hey Dad, did you know that the ocean has paths in it?” “Yes,” I said, “where did you hear about that?” She replied, “We’re studying oceanography in 4th grade, and we learned it from Psalm 8.” Then we looked up Psalm 8 and read it together while we walked by the ocean. And once again, I thanked the Lord for the wonderful teachers and Bible-based education that my children have received.

If you’re investing yourself or your resources into giving your children a biblical education, stay at it—one day they will truly thank you. Nothing could better prepare them for life than having a biblical perspective in a world full of lies!

“O LORD our Lord, how excellent is thy name in all the earth! who hast set thy glory above the heavens. Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings hast thou ordained strength because of thine enemies, that thou mightest still the enemy and the avenger. When I consider thy heavens, the work of thy fingers, the moon and the stars, which thou hast ordained; What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou visitest him? For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour. Thou madest him to have dominion over the works of thy hands; thou hast put all things under his feet: All sheep and oxen, yea, and the beasts of the field; The fowl of the air, and the fish of the sea, and whatsoever passeth through the paths of the seas. O LORD our Lord, how excellent is thy name in all the earth!”

Psalm 8

Posted in family | Tagged family, parenting | 4 Comments

Problems with Fun-Focused Youth Ministry

By caryschmidt | February 15, 2010

Is your youth ministry Bible-focused or fun-focused? It’s easy to focus more on making the youth group fun than on making it biblical. I’m all for having a good time with students in the right context, but we have a much higher calling. How easy it is to fall into the trap of spending more time planning silliness than studying for Bible lessons.

Over the years, I’ve been delighted to find that teens really appreciate a strong biblical focus. Inherently, they know life is more than fun and games, and they know we are supposed to lead them to maturity. When we raise the bar spiritually, they rise to the occasion.

Here are some problems with the pop-culture, fun-focused model of student ministry:

Posted in student ministry | Tagged biblical living, local church, ministry, student ministry, sunday school, teen life | 7 Comments

10 Things Teens Won’t Tell You (Part 1)

By caryschmidt | February 8, 2010

Have you noticed that teens are tight lipped? For a myriad of reasons—usually intimidation being the biggest—they really find it difficult to talk to adults at times. This is especially true with parents. In every home, there is a spiritual battle against authentic communication. Let’s face it—the devil doesn’t want parents and teens to truly open their hearts to each other.

But strong families resist this battle and conquer it. On the other side of the mountain of silence is a fertile meadow of healthy hearts. It’s a deliberate journey to get there, but it’s worth the effort. There isn’t a much sweeter experience in life than open, honest, heart-full communication between a parent and teen. When you have it, you gain a deep, satisfactory sense that this is what God intended in a family.

Malachi 4:6 teaches, “And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers…” In an effort to turn your heart toward your children, I wanted to share the results of a simple survey I did with our students several years ago. These statements and quotes came from faithful Christian adults who grew up in godly homes and in our youth group. The quotes below is what they shared about why they stayed faithful God. This list is what your teens think, whether they tell you or not; and it’s a great place to start a conversation:

Posted in family, student ministry | Tagged adolescence, family, parenting, student ministry, teen life | 1 Comment

New SL Podcast—Striving Together

By caryschmidt | February 1, 2010

Podcast: Download

The February edition of the Spiritual Leadership Podcast has just posted! And Pastor Paul Chappell shares an insightful “in-studio” interview regarding the lesson.

Originally taught at the Spiritual Leadership Conference 2009, it is entitled “Striving Together.” This lesson focuses on how we should encourage one another in ministry.

The Spiritual Leadership podcast is a free resource from Striving Together Publications (a ministry of Lancaster Baptist Church and West Coast Baptist College).

You can subscribe to this podcast through iTunes and listen on your computer or iPod. You can also receive the complimentary outline with each lesson. Click here for more information about subscribing to the outline.

Enjoy the lesson!

Posted in books and resources | Tagged leadership, ministry, podcast, striving together | 1 Comment

8 Reasons to Follow a Great Leader

By Cary Schmidt | February 1, 2010

Everybody, in some respect is a leader, and everybody is a follower. Few are called to be the key leader. Many more are called to follow and support a key leader. For instance, a family may have many members but should have one father. A team can have many players (and leaders) but only one head-coach. A church can have multiple leaders, but one senior pastor that clarifies the vision and sets the direction.

How about you? Do you have to be the “lead-leader?” Or has God called you, like most, to follow (and lead) from somewhere in the middle of the pack? If He has, then here are some great reasons to love what God has called you to do:

1. To Be Like Jesus—repeatedly Jesus reminded us that He was sent here by the Father and was on mission from Him, under His authority. (John 4:34, “Jesus saith unto them, My meat is to do the will of him that sent me, and to finish his work.)

2. To Function How God Designed You—God designs some to be visionary and others to implement vision. I’m the latter. That’s not to say that I (or you) are not capable of vision, but simply that I would much rather administrate, strategize, and execute the vision than originate it. For example: Make me think of what should be done—and I’ll flounder in an ocean of endless possibilities, never getting anything done. Tell me what God has put on your heart to accomplish and immediately my mind and heart engage in processing a plan to make it happen.

Posted in leadership | Tagged church staff, leadership, ministry, productivity, team | 1 Comment

New Curriculum—Salt and Light!

By caryschmidt | January 28, 2010

Striving Together Publications is excited to announce the soon availability (Feb. 12) of this new adult curriculum from Dr. Mark Rasmussen! This 13 lesson series was over two years in development, and I’m extremely happy with the finished product. Dr. Rasmussen is one of the greatest Christian educators alive today, and you will find this resource helpful for both adults and teens in your church!

The study features a close examination of 13 metaphors for the Christian life—sheep, soldier, runner, salt, light, etc. It’s just a great study, and your church family will benefit from it.

The resource comes with a teacher guide and a student guide. Why? The teacher’s guide includes all the teaching material, illustrations, scripture references, and lesson details. The student guide features the blank outline, scripture references, lesson summary, and then a follow up study guide for each lesson. The student guides are extremely affordable and well worth the investment.

Why use the student guide?

A New Report on Spanking

By caryschmidt | January 26, 2010

Last week, the Wall Street Journal reported on a recent study that validated (not that it needed to be) the biblical model of child-rearing—spankings combined with balanced love, forgiveness, and nurture. The study showed that kids who were spanked actually did better in many areas of life, including academically, than those who were not spanked.

The study also showed some negative results in those who continued to receive spankings into their teen years. Sadly, few parents would realize that those results are related to relationships that are already broken in the first place. So many parents use spanking unwisely over trite, trivial matters—operating in the flesh (in anger) and not the Spirit. In other words, we think that a few undiscerning “whacks”, delivered in anger, accomplishes something—when in fact, lose-handed, unprincipled discipline creates problems rather than resolving them.

Posted in family | Tagged family, parenting | 1 Comment

New Data about Kids and Media

By caryschmidt | January 24, 2010

Several days ago the LA Times reported on a Kaiser Family Foundation study that showed kids are now averaging 53 hours per week in digital media, including TV, video games, cell phone, computer, etc. This does not include when kids are multitasking—perhaps using their phone and watching TV at the same time. When factoring those numbers, the usage jumps to about 75 hours per week—an astounding number.

The most interesting fact presented was the impact of parental oversight. When parents engage, set boundaries, and train their children, those same kids averaged 3 hours less per day—21 hours less in a week. That’s a pretty powerful difference.

Posted in family | Tagged adolescence, danger, family, media & tech, parenting, social networking, technology | Leave a comment

Making Marriage a Priority

By caryschmidt | January 23, 2010

A month ago, Dana and I crossed our 20-year anniversary together. With the busyness of the Christmas season, we waited until this past week to get some time away. The Lord allowed us to spend five days on the central California coast (an area we haven’t visited much in the last decade). I had forgotten how beautiful it was.

In summary—it rained all week long—and we loved every moment together. God gave us an especially memorable afternoon of sunlight when we were able to walk along some ocean cliffs, enjoy the giant waves, watch the sunset, and savor the unspoiled coastline. It was one of the most memorable days of our married life.